guidelines for my celebration of birth skin stretching another year
Here are some things I will willingly accept.
- Legitimate hugs
- Entity to listen to me bitch no matter the hour of night and come with me on spontaneous excursions and offer advice I won’t take but still offer it anyway to console me (to replace my current entity, that never did its job anyway)
- Joan Jett’s resignation from music
- Leaving me alone for an extended period of time
- Unless I don’t want you to
- But I probably do
- But if I don’t you will anyway so just fucking scratch that.
- Braces for Anna Paquin
- Cheap and mediocre home made mobiles/cookies/friendship bracelets
Here are things I will not accept, or will be pissed off if given.
- Surprise parties
- Jewelry, because you’ll get me something I don’t like anyway.
- Cards. They are wastes of paper.
- Lime Tostitos being discontinued
2 years ago